Where Do We Go From Here?
by Slayerette16
Summary: Post-NFA Spike is injured and with a dying, recently Shanshu'd Angel on his hands he turns to the only person he can. But how will she react knowing he's not dead? And how useful can Angel be now he's just human? Not in line with the comic books but takes all of BTVS and Angel the series as canon. SEQUEL UP NOW: Too Good To Be True!
1. After the Battle

The demon fell to his knees and his face slapped onto the wet concrete showering Spike's feet in rainwater. He heaved a sigh of relief and dropped to his own knees, wiping the blood off his cheek with the back of his hand.

A few rays peeked over the horizon and Spike came to his senses, dragging his aching carcass back up and scanning the landscape for shelter. The closest thing was the decimated remains of The Hyperion. Slapping his way through the street, he ducked inside.

"Illyria? Angel?" Spike hollered at the top of his lungs. "Angel!!!!"

His blue eyes darted across the street before landing on the hulking body of Angel.

"Bloody hell." Spike shook his head in annoyance and headed back out into the early morning.

The sun was rapidly crawling its way across the sky and Spike muttered a silent prayer that he could get in and out quick. His hand grasped Angel's shoulder and he shook him vigorously.

"Angel. Angel, come on you great poof get up! Angel, the sun...come on." Spike yanked his arm but he just rolled over. "For God's sake..."

Spike huffed and lugged Angel's body into his arms. With one last look at the approaching sunlight he staggered on his weak body back over to The Hyperion. With his last bit of effort he secured him and Angel's places in the shadows and collapsed onto the ground.

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Spike awoke with a start, Illyria's cerulean eyes staring into his soul. "Christ, Blue!"

"You are still alive." Illyria noted.

"Yup, same goes for you." Spike nodded towards her. "Gunn?"

"Dead. I do not know where he is, I saw him go down. No human could have survived that."

"Shame. I liked old Charlie Boy." Spike sighed.

"How hurt are you?" Illyria demanded.

Spike realised he hadn't actually looked at his injuries since the battle ended and he began to inspect himself. He had a stab wound on his left shoulder and one in his stomach with a smattering of bruises and scratches across his whole body. "Not too bad." He shrugged painfully.

"Angel. He is barely alive." Illyria trained her eyes on Angel's still unconscious form.

"Well he's not dust so.." Spike hoisted Angel's body into a seated position.

"He will not be dust."

"Well I bloody well hope not."

"You misunderstand me. I mean even dead, he will not be dust."

Spike cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"This one, he is human now."

"Boy are you off your game! He's not.." Spike sniffed the air around his grandsire. That was Angel's scent alright: hair gel, that horrible aftershave and his soul, with that bitter undertone that cursed souls have...no vampire scent though.

"The prophecy." Illyria stated simply.

"Shanshu. Bloody typical, I save the world just as many times and this git becomes human." Spike shook his head.

"Why would you want to be human?" Illyria blinked in confusion. "They're weak and emotional."

Spike scoffed. "Too right. I'd be an awful human...but maybe Buffy would finally get what she deserved."

Illyria didn't answer, she'd been taught not to speak when anyone mentioned this 'Buffy' person. Spike cleared his head of thoughts of his former lover and turned his attention back to Angel.

Spike placed his cool palm against the back of Angel's head and felt the warm blood ooze through his fingers. That wound could kill a human. Time for action.

"Illyria, do you have enough power left to open me a portal?" Spike asked.

"Yes." Illyria replied, not making any movement.

"You wanna do that then?" Spike prompted.

"Where are you going?"

"The only place I can."

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The wind whistled through the castle's ancient walls, the stones encasing every chill. The gang had gone to bed hours before, even the girls patrolling that night had already retired to their bedrooms as well. Now it was just her, slumped on the grand staircase, head resting against the bannister, thinking.

With crack of lightning and a clap of magic, a portal tore its way through the fabric of the air. Out of the abyss he appeared, black combat boots, leather duster, cheekbones so sharp they could cut vegetables and a gelled top of bleached hair. In his arms, a slumbering Angel, a crust of dried blood caked in his hair.

"Spike?"

"Hi, Buffy."


	2. Little Talk

"You're...what's...how..." Buffy babbled and stuttered, wildly gesturing with her hands.

"Later, pet. Right now I need help with Peaches here." Spike shuffled awkwardly under Angel's weight.

Buffy cursed her delayed reaction, she could be a young girl later right now she needed the Slayer. "Right. Of course."

The portal hissed and crackled before zipping itself back up, Spike muttered a thank you to Illyria and followed Buffy up the stairs. She led Spike through the castle to the medical room. There was only one bed in there with crisp, clean white sheets on top. At this time of night it was devoid of people, the only company they had was the harsh blue lighting and the shelves of medical supplies. Spike gently laid Angel down on the bed.

"Where's he hurt?" Buffy demanded rifling through bandages and ointments.

"Definitely his head. Maybe elsewhere too."

"How long has he been out?" Buffy set to work with disinfectant wipes and bandages.

"About 12 hours I should say, maybe longer."

"Can you get some blood for him from the kitchen?" Buffy asked as she finished wiping away the blood and began wrapping up his head.

"I don't think that's the best idea right now."

"And why not?" Buffy questioned angrily.

"He's human."

She froze, her hands hovering aimlessly over Angel's motionless body. Her eyes darted up to Spike's and she turned to face him.

"What did you just say?"

"He's human." Spike repeated irritatedly.

"You wanna give me the how, or should I just keep gawping for your amusement?" Buffy snapped.

"There was a prophecy, a vampire with a soul would play a huge part in the apocalypse or some kind of bollocks." Spike shrugged. "It'd turn him human or something..."

"But you're a vampire with a soul too." Buffy pointed out.

"Yeah but I'm not the hero." Spike reminded her.

Buffy's demeanour instantly softened. "That's not true."

Spike shook her off and instead said. "Can you help me out now?"

"You could've said something, I'm a slayer not a mind reader." Buffy said jokingly and gestured for him to show her his injuries.

Spike winced as he took off his duster and t-shirt revealing his two stab wounds. They were both incredibly deep and as soon as his eyes drunk in the extent of the wounds they ached intensely. Most of the blood was dry, only a light trickle was seeping from the wounds, but it was painful as hell. He felt the adrenaline drain from his body and pain re-fill it.

"Lucky you're still a vampire." Buffy remarked, cleaning his wounds. "Or you'd be deader than...well than you already are I guess."

Spike rolled his eyes at her as he attempted to focus on anything but the pain as she dressed his wounds. Buffy gave him a gentle pat on the stomach to signify she was done and he carefully straightened up.

"Should we wake him up or something?" Spike asked, waving his hand in Angel's direction.

"I don't think so. I mean for all we know it's a side effect of the spell right?" Buffy guessed.

"So what should we do?"

"Let's just let him sleep it off and we can get Willow to perform a little magical whammy in the morning."

"What's the time now?" Spike realised he had no clue what day it even was either.

"1am." Buffy replied eyeing the clock on the wall.

"And what day is it?" Spike shyly asked.

"Wednesday."

"Okay, makes sense."

"So you're not like..concussed or anything right? No amnesia? Vomiting? Death?"

Spike laughed. "No, pet, I'm fine."

"Good. Then you and me are gonna have a little talk."

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Spike and Buffy were sat awkwardly at the kitchen table, Spike shuffling his feet every few minutes and Buffy slowly sipping her hot chocolate. He'd already drained four glasses of pig's blood from nerves and was furiously tapping his fingers for something to do with his hands.

"So, you didn't die." Buffy pointed out, lamely, wow the tiredness must really be getting to her.

"Well no I did, I just sorta...came back." Spike replied.

"Why didn't you come find me?"

"I'm finding you now."

"That's not good enough!" Buffy leapt to her feet, knocking the mug of hot chocolate over.

The scalding liquid splashed across the table and Spike jumped up too, wiping his hand on his jacket. "Bloody hell, woman!"

"Shut up! You don't have the right to 'bloody hell' me!" Buffy yelled. "How long have you been back?"

"About 9 months." Spike admitted.

"And you couldn't have called? Texted? Freakin' emailed? What the hell, Spike?" Buffy started flapping, hitting him wildly with her open palms.

"Buffy...Buffy..." Spike was twisting trying to grab her hands. "Buffy."

He clasped her wrists tightly, and she stopped hitting him. "Sorry, I lost my cool for a sec, I'm okay."

Buffy shrugged him off and stepped back. "Why didn't you call me?"

"I just...I didn't want you to..." Spike babbled, unsure of what to say.

"I mourned you."

Spike felt his heart drop out of his chest. "What?" He croaked.

"I thought about you every single day. I still have nightmares, Dawn comes in sometimes and wakes me up 'cause I'm screaming so loudly. Sometimes she doesn't hear me though." Buffy's eyes dropped to the floor, Spike took a step towards her, but she took a step back.

"Buffy..." Spike began.

"I told you I loved you. And you didn't believe me. I thought you died not believing me." Buffy felt broken now, spilling all of the thoughts that had clouded her mind over the last few months. Things she hadn't let herself speak out loud. "Your death. It actually hurt, I could feel it, in my bones." Tears filled her eyes as she clutched her chest.

"I'm sorry." Spike whispered.

"Yeah." Buffy said tonelessly. "Wait, where did you go? You didn't-you weren't-Wait-what..." Buffy panicked then, wiping the tears away swiftly.

"I wasn't in heaven, pet. Or wherever you were." Spike assured her.

"You weren't.." Buffy's hand flew to her mouth.

"No, I wasn't in hell either." Spike hurried to explain. "I wasn't really anywhere. Guess the PTB didn't know what to do with me, huh? Guess I just balanced the scales. Too good to be bad, too bad to be good." Spike laughed emptily.

"That's not fair." Buffy said quietly.

"Maybe I wasn't dead long enough, I don't know." Spike shrugged. "One minute I'm burning up in the Hellmouth, all heroic like. Next minute I'm standing in Captain Forehead's office being gawked at like a sodding tourist attraction."

"Don't even get me started on the fact that none of them told me either! I swear to God when Angel wakes up he's gonna have the ass kicking of a lifetime, I don't care if he's human."

"Much as I hate to admit it, it's not his fault. It's mine."

"Why didn't you come and find me, Spike?" Buffy asked again, sternly.

"I didn't want you to...think less of me."

"What?" Buffy felt an ache in her chest for the sadness in his voice.

"I was a hero. Saved the world. And even got the girl. Then all of a sudden, I'm back, playing Casper at Wolfram and Hart. Not a hero at all."

Buffy stepped towards him, placing a hand on his cheek, guiding his eyes to her face. "You're still a hero, Spike. You always have been, to me."

"Really?" Buffy smiled gently at him in reply.

"I'm so sorry, pet."

And with those words she was done, done being strong, done throwing herself into work, done with it all. Tears gushed from her eyes, soaking her cheeks instantly. Buffy choked out fat sobs, and didn't protest when Spike's arms snaked around her waist. He pulled her into him and she rested her head against his chest, her hands tightly clutching his back. Spike shushed her, stroking her hair gently with one hand.

Buffy's knees gave way then and she slumped to the floor. Spike travelled down with her, cradling her against him, his whole body wrapped around her as she released the emotion she'd been holding in for far too long.


	3. Clearing Things Up

**_A/N: I realise so far (this chapter included) I've made it seem as if Buffy and Spike are just gonna get together ASAP like nothing happened. That's not how it's gonna be, also this chapter is super boring but it's just clearing up a few things to be said. The next chapter is where the action starts, so I'll be posting it on the regular upload day (Sunday) and in the mean time you get this boring one as a kinda bonus? ~BB x_**

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Buffy was exhausted, it was nearing 3am and Spike had finally finished his story. Telling her about the exploits of his time in LA, including his ghostly trips to hell and the time Angel had turned into a puppet. He recounted all of the troubles the gang had had with Wolfram and Hart and bravely fought back tears when he told her about the lives they'd lost on the way. Finally after explaining the battle in excruciatingly painful detail, Buffy was drained.

"Wow."

"Sorry, kinda overwhelmed you there didn't I?" Spike realised.

"A little." Buffy admitted.

"It's just...it's funny whenever all these things happened I always imagined myself telling you, ya know? How I'd explain it or make you laugh when I told you. Guess I got carried away."

Buffy couldn't help but grin at his cuteness, damn his cuteness! How was she supposed to be mad at him?

"Well Buffy is beat. I'm supposed to be up in 4 hours to train the girls." Buffy yawned.

"Wait I have something I wanna ask." Spike held up a hand.

"Umm...okay. What's the what?"

"Rome. How was Rome?" Spike bit back his anger, keeping his voice steady.

"Rome? I've never been." Buffy shook her head in confusion.

"Bollocks! Me and Angel saw you there!" Spike protested.

"What? Ohhhhhhh..." Realisation dawned on Buffy. "That wasn't me."

"Huh?"

"There's a few fake Buffys stationed around the world. 'Cause it turns out when you activated a crap load of slayers, you make a few enemies."

"So you've never met The Immortal?" Spike confirmed.

"The Immortal? Nope." Buffy shook her head resolutely. "Never heard of him."

Spike breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank God."

"I'm too tired to ask what the hell that was about so you wanna just go to bed?"

"Yeah, sounds good. Do you have anywhere I can sleep?" Spike tentatively requested.

"Umm..." Buffy thought for a moment. "We do have a ton of spare rooms but most of them are unfurnished...Faith's leaving this morning for Cleveland, setting up a base on the Hellmouth. You can have her room after that. Until then...you can stay in mine."

No sooner had she said it did she realise the implications of that offer. She didn't want to have sex with him. Or did she? Did he want to have sex with her? No Buffy get your mind outta the gutter!

"No it's okay. I can take the couch." Spike assured her.

"Spike. You just saved the world, you're not sleeping on the couch. We're mature adults, I think we can handle sharing a bed for one night."

Buffy slipped gently under the covers. I mean it wasn't like she was naked or anything. She had pyjamas on and he'd kept his jeans on. Buffy assumed this was because he still didn't wear underwear.

They slept facing away from each other, neither one of them sure where they stood in each other's hearts. Buffy had barely been asleep twenty minutes when she awoke to the whole bed shaking.

"Spike?" She whispered into her pillow.

With no answer she forced herself to sit up, Spike was convulsing wildly in bed.

"Spike? What is it? What's happening?" Buffy hissed into his ear.

"Apocalypse! Don't wanna die!" Spike cried out in his dreams. "Buffy..." He moaned quieter.

Buffy caressed his cheek gently with her hand. "Shhhh, Spike it's okay. You're okay now..."

"Buffy..." Spike muttered again. "Don't wanna die without Buffy..."

Buffy weaved her way into his body, pressing herself up against him. "Spike, it's okay. You're dreaming." She whispered gently into his face.

Spike's eyes lightly fluttered open and he saw Buffy's small body wedged between his arms. "Buffy?"

"You were having a nightmare." Buffy clarified.

"Oh." Spike thought for a second but Buffy made no attempt to move away from him. So he relaxed a little, allowing his arms to fully encase her in his embrace.

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Buffy had finished explaining probably around 3 minutes ago now and still no one had said a word. Willow, Xander and Dawn just sat there gaping at her, to be honest she was starting to feel a little uncomfortable.

"So..Spike's alive? And...and Angel's human?" Willow stammered.

"These are the facts." Buffy confirmed.

"And they just stopped the apocalypse in LA." Dawn weighed in.

"Affirmative."

"Just when I thought our lives were getting a little routine." Xander joked.

Buffy smiled. They had been getting a routine, training the new Slayers here, the new Watchers Council Giles and Andrew were setting up in England and Faith en route to Cleveland to help Wood open up the next base on the only remaining Hellmouth. Evil was coming and being stopped pretty sharpish and Buffy spent most of her days sparring or shopping. As close to normal as her life would get. And so far...she was kinda sick of it.

"Where's Spike now?" Dawn wondered.

"Upstairs in bed, he needed rest."

"Where did he sleep?" Willow asked, realising to late that the answer probably wouldn't be what Xander wanted to hear.

Buffy's face reddened a little. "My room..."

Xander raised an eyebrow and Buffy continued. "Nothing happened or anything...I was hoping we could get Faith's old room ready for him today actually."

"Yeah sure, me and some of the girls will do it." Dawn offered. "Clean sheets and some blackout blinds?"

"Thanks, Dawnie." Buffy was grateful her sister had latched on to her topic change.

"You want me to look at Angel?"

"Thanks for the offer, Will but I'm gonna pass on that for a bit. I'm seeing him this morning and if he still can't be stirred I'll call you. Xander, keep on with the girls' day as normal. Regular classes and training. I don't want word getting out yet, not until we know the deal about this prophecy." Buffy instructed.

"Whatever you say, Buff." Xander agreed.

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Buffy sauntered into the medical room, and was thoroughly taken aback by the sight of Angel partially sitting up in bed. Ironically, he looked paler than he did as a vampire, his body was slumped and weak and his face a mask of pain.

"Buffy?" Angel croaked. "Oh thank God! I had no idea where I was and moving is so painful..."

Buffy rushed to his side. "I know. Are you okay?"

"I guess...why does it hurt this much?" Angel groaned.

"Angel...I don't know how to tell you this but...you're human." Buffy revealed.

"What? That can't be right. I signed away my destiny. I gave the prophecy up to Wolfram and Hart! I can't be human." Angel shook his head in disbelief.

"Well coulda fooled me with the body temp and the beating heart. See for yourself."

Angel crinkled his forehead up, growling. But no animalistic snarl came from his throat, just a scratchy groan. His hands flew to his forehead, no bumps and then delicately fingered his canines, no points.

"I'm human." Angel echoed.

"Yup." Buffy beamed at him. "Congrats!"

Buffy threw herself into his arms and he moaned loudly. She guiltily pulled herself off of him and he stretched out his limbs a little. "Sorry." Buffy patted his arm.

"That's okay. I forgot how long it takes humans to heal." Angel rubbed the back of his sore neck. "How long until I'm actually useful again?"

"A month...ish." Buffy shrugged.

"That long?"

"Gotta take the rough with the smooth." Buffy smiled, he huffed in reply.

"Which reminds me, now you're not dying, wanna tell me why you didn't call me to say that Spike's alive?" Buffy placed her hands on her hips.

"I thought he told you?" Angel tried but Buffy just raised her eyebrows at him and he relented. "Fine. I just felt...it was his decision."

"I get that, but Angel we're supposed to be friends or at least allies and you didn't have my back!"

"What the hell does that even mean?"

"It means just say you were wrong and apologise, you idiot!"

"Okay, so maybe I was wrong. But I'm not apologising, he's here now isn't he?"

"Yeah, no thanks to you." Buffy sneered.

"Oh I'm sorry, was I supposed to set up my ex and enemy? I didn't get the memo on that one!"

"So that's what that was about? You didn't call me because you didn't want me and Spike to get back together!"

"No! That's not what I meant!"

"Well, what did you mean then?"

"I...I meant...I don't know!"

"Whatever, Angel. Let's just...leave it. Get some rest, Willow will be by later to check you over and get you some breakfast."

Buffy turned her back on his stuttering replies and swept out of the door.


	4. Sparring

The training room was one of the largest rooms in the castle, the stone walls were stripped bare and heavy blackout blinds had been hung over the windows. The floors were padded end to end with large blue mats, to prevent injury. This room was only used for hand-to-hand combat (and the odd stake) so the weapons were in another room. The team had made the executive decision to split the two after Faith and Buffy had been sparring and Faith had thrown Buffy against a wall, accidentally sending an axe down after her. Around seven inches of Buffy's ponytail were lopped clean off.

The wall at the front was taken up mostly by a blackboard, which Buffy was leaning against, scrawled across it was 'Rules Of Fighting Vamps'. Around 30 girls were huddled together on the mats, chatting in hushed tones.

"So girls, as you know, Faith left us a little over a week ago to set up a base on the Cleveland Hellmouth. That left us down a trainer."

A murmur went through the training room as the girls argued in hushed tones about who the new trainer would be.

"This is Spike."

Buffy beckoned him inside and Spike strolled causally into the room. Awkwardly he raised a hand in hello, and gravitated to Buffy's side.

A girl raised her hand and Buffy called upon her. "Is this Spike? As in the Spike?"

"The Spike?" Spike raised an eyebrow at her.

Buffy blushed. "Yes, it is."

"I thought he died." Another girl piped up.

"I did." Spike nodded. "I got better."

Buffy rolled her eyes and continued. "He was trapped inside the amulet he wore. A friend of ours released him and here he is. You girls should know by now that in our line of work no one stays dead for long. He's just come back from another apocalypse funny enough."

"Where did you go when you died?" A younger girl in the front row asked.

Spike met Buffy's eyes and they shared a subliminal conversation. Buffy hurriedly said, "Let's not talk about that! Today we're gonna begin with a little demo from me and Spike. Right, Spike?"

"Anything for you, Slayer" Spike flashed a grin.

Buffy got into her fighting stance, fists raised already smiling. "I've missed this."

Naturally, the pair slipped into fighting. Buffy threw a punch from each arm, both easily deflected by Spike. The vampire ducked, swiping at Buffy's legs, who leapt over them easily. She forced a foot into his chest, sending him stumbling backwards.

"Clara, what's the first rule of fighting a vampire?" Buffy panted, not taking her eyes off of Spike. For these few minutes, they were their original selves, Slayer and vampire, enemies.

"Umm...don't always expect attacks, expect defences too." Clara recited.

"Defences, huh?"

"That one's from you." Buffy laughed, ducking a swing. "You were always good at deflecting punches."

"Don't flatter me, luv. I'll get a big head."

Buffy leapt into the air, spinning a flurry of punches from either arm across his body. She followed through, grabbing his shirt in her hand and pressing him against the wall.

"Ronnie! Rule 2?" Buffy winked at Spike as she threw him back down to the floor.

Once he was on the floor, Buffy settled on top of him, straddling his body with her thighs.

"Careful, Slayer, you're turning me on." Spike sneered.

"Never think you've got the upper hand?" Ronnie tried.

As if on cue, Spike clasped Buffy around the back and pushed back against her body. Forcing them so that he was on top, trapping Buffy beneath him.

"Too right, pet." Spike snarled into his fangs at Ronnie who gasped.

Spike leant down, pretending to try and bite Buffy's neck.

"And that brings me on to Rule 3." Buffy strained as she bent her neck away from Spike.

Swiftly, Buffy pressed her hands hard into the flesh of Spike's face. With as much force behind her palms as she could, she shoved him backwards, sending him sprawling to the floor.

"Anything, any way is a weapon." Buffy breathed.

Buffy spun around the room, guiding Spike back into their well versed dance. She hopped over to a broom propped against the door. Buffy spun it through her fingers like a baton, mimicking Spike's movements when he killed Nikki Wood.

Spike reached out to grab it, attempting to wrench it from her grip. When she was sure he had a firm hold on it, Buffy spun it around, slamming Spike against the wall.

"Bloody hell." Spike rubbed the back of his head. Buffy cackled, snapped the broom over her knee and advanced on him.

"And the final rule?" Buffy asked aloud as she skipped over to the exhausted vampire.

"If you win, you're lucky, not perfect." A girl at the far back called across the room.

"Exactly, Priyanka."

Buffy plunged the snapped wood into Spike's chest. The slayers gasped loudly. Spike looked down at the wood sticking out of his body.

"Now that was just unnecessary." Spike rolled his eyes.

"I'm still pissed at you." Buffy reminded him.

"Why didn't he die?" Vi asked, Spike remembered her from Sunnydale.

"I missed the heart." Buffy shrugged.

"Only just." Spike grumbled.

"Deep breath in." Buffy instructed.

Spike took a sharp intake of breath just as Buffy yanked out the stake.

"There we go, good as new."

Spike glared at her and pointed to a pool of his blood already collecting on the fabric of his t-shirt.

"Just head down to medical, they'll patch you up." Buffy patted him happily on the shoulder.

"Remind me not to fight with you again." Spike said as he wandered towards the door.

"You couldn't, it's too fun."

"Got me there, pet."

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"Okay! Great work today, girls. Check the rota on your way out for patrol tonight. But overall good job! Any questions before we go?" Buffy called to the sweating and panting girls. A few hands were raised, surprising Buffy.

"Ayuko." Buffy pointed to her.

"You and Spike fighting was just...woah. Do you really enjoy it?" Ayuko asked somewhat excitedly.

Buffy chuckled. "Yeah actually, I do. As messed up as it sounds. We've always been pretty similar fighters. Our techniques just...gel I guess."

Ayuko nodded and Buffy gestured to the next girl. "Do you think we'll ever find that? With someone I mean? A perfect fighting partner?"

"I can only hope yours is less annoying than mine, but I assume so. When you fight with someone, against them or with them, as long as me and Spike have...you just find a rhythm. You know?" Buffy searched for the right words. "Like I know by the way Spike moves his pinky which direction he's gonna go in. If he twitches his eyebrow I know he's in pain and he's gonna take a step back. You just learn each other's little...quirks. We're quirky." Buffy shrugged.

She brought herself back to reality to see the raised eyebrows of the girls in front of her. A lot of them were giggling and whispering about Buffy and Spike. Great.

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"How you feeling, Gramps?" Spike asked Angel as he grabbed for the bandages on the shelf above his head.

"A little better I guess. It's so boring being cooped up in here though. I feel so..."

"Helpless? Comparable to a waste of space?" Spike sarcastically offered, peeling off his blood soaked shirt.

Angel glared at and pointed to the hole in his chest. "Who stabbed you?"

"Buffy." Spike wrapped the bandage around the span of his chest, cut it and secured it in place.

"Buffy stabbed you?"

"Staked me would be more accurate."

Angel didn't even try to stifle his laugh. "What'd you do?"

"We were just sparring. Sometimes she likes to remind me a little more obviously if she's pissed off at me."

"Really? I don't remember me and Buffy really sparring that much. She definitely never staked me."

"Girl likes not holding back. Sometimes she's done with the talking, just needs to express her frustration in the simplest way possible." Spike gave a light tap of the bandage. "With stakings."

Angel scoffed. "Yeah you understand her. Well on your way to getting her back, William."

"How do you know I want her back?"

Angel raised an eyebrow at this, not even dignifying it with a verbal response.

"Hey don't do the eyebrow! That's my thing!" Spike protested.

"All I'm gonna say is, I'm human now. I figure that puts me back in the running." Angel grinned proudly.

"Bring it on, old man."


	5. Human Instincts

"You sure you're ready to patrol?" Buffy checked with Angel.

He'd been out of the medical room and into his own bedroom for around a week, it'd been just over a month since him and Spike had arrived. Angel's wounds had healed as well as they ever would and he was itching to jump back into the game, test out these human instincts of his and more importantly prove himself to Buffy.

She was more cautious, she'd seen the complications of patrolling with humans, yes it was good with the extra hands, but it wasn't worth the stress of having to watch them 24/7. And something told her Angel was in for the shock of his life (Unlife? New life?) when he remembered just how helpless humans can be when confronted with the supernatural.

"Buffy, I'm not a child, just human." Angel reminded her.

"Yeah emphasis on the 'just' mate." Spike interjected.

"And why is he here for this conversation again?" Angel scowled.

"Because this decision affects him too."

"Doesn't have to, we can just patrol. Me and you, like old times."

"I think you'll find that the right to say patrolling with Buffy is 'like old times' is reserved for me. And I'm not letting you get her killed with your Irish tavern-boy, prostitution-loving human self."

"That's enough, Spike." Buffy reprimanded. "Let's just get moving."

The three of them took to the graveyard. The ground was sodden and spongy, Buffy's heeled boots sinking into the mud with every step she took. Her former boyfriends were already driving her crazy, Spike was itching for a fight and so was Angel, both eager to prove their ability.

Buffy was packing her usual weapons, a stake clutched firmly in her right hand, one slipped into her boot and a third in her back pocket. Spike twirled a stake casually between his fingers, while Angel squeezed the pointed wood between his own sweaty palm. He'd refused to bring another one, on the principle that Buffy didn't make Spike bring two. Buffy had felt it best not to point out that most nights she didn't even make Spike take one.

"Why are we doing this again?" Spike groaned, they'd been out for nearly an hour and he hadn't gotten a chance to hit anything.

"Because it's better to get Angel back into the swing of things with something he's familiar with. The girls can have one night off."

"What I wanna know is why I have to be the one walking in the middle. I'm not in need of protection from either side you know." Angel grumbled.

"You're in the middle because otherwise you'd get in the way of the way we stand." Spike rolled his eyes almost audibly.

"What?"

"I always stand on Buffy's left, she always stands on my right. That way we both have our dominant hands free to attack." Spike explained slowly, much to Angel's annoyance.

"Oh. I didn't know you guys had...a routine." Spike chuckled a little, pleased he'd got under Angel's skin.

Angel on the other hand was just confused, they planned this? Knew how to stand? How they fought together? He hadn't realised they'd been this...in tune with one another.

"Houston, we have a vampire." Buffy announced.

"Where?" Angel threw up his stake.

"Nearby." Spike's eyes roved over the cemetery, breathing in intensely.

"How many?" Buffy asked him, her neck burning with the vampire tingles. "All I can tell is a lot."

"Six..maybe seven." Spike decided.

Angel scowled to himself, he was starting to see why humans didn't do this and had a newfound respect for his old friend, Gunn. He couldn't sense them like Buffy or smell them like Spike, he was utterly helpless until they jumped him. And oh look, that's what they were doing now. Angel hadn't even reacted before his head was smacking against the muddy grass, a vampire hunched over him.

"Angel!" Buffy hollered, grunting as she staked one of the others.

"Cover me!" Spike ordered as he sprinted over to his grandsire.

The vampire was pounding Angel's body, he struggled and kicked but his opponent was too strong and without his vampire strength he was easily pinned. The creature's teeth were an inch from Angel's neck when Spike staked him in the back, sending a cloud of dust into Angel's face.

Buffy was still attacking, sending a flurry of blows down on one vampire. She grabbed his body up and, clutching at his clothing, tossed him into his other two buddies knocking them to the earth. Spike was by her side in a flash and they held their guards up, ready to attack.

"What you thinking?" Spike panted.

"I'll get the two on the left you get the one on the right?" Buffy suggested.

"Hey, no fair you get more!"

"I'll take one." Angel offered, he was back on his feet, attempting to slow down his heavy breathing.

"I don't know.." Buffy took a few steps back as the trio advanced on them.

"I'll be fine, that other guy caught me unawares is all." Angel shrugged nonchalantly.

"You can have the one in the middle, he's only a fledge." Buffy decided.

"And he's only a human..." Spike muttered under his breath both thankful and irritated that Angel's lack of vampiric hearing had meant he didn't catch the insult.

"No time to argue." Angel leapt onto his vamp, tackling him straight to the earth.

Buffy headed for her own, slamming her fist into the girl's face before knocking her legs from under her. She snatched a handful of her shirt and dragged her into the air, staking her cleanly. Spike snarled at his prey and enjoyed watching the fear cross his face. Spike gave a few little punches here and there on the guy's chest and abdomen before giving up on playing with the poor excuse for a vampire and staking him out of pity.

"What a sorry lot that was. Even the older ones were bloody awful." Spike told Buffy.

"Uh oh." Buffy ignored his comment and hurried over to Angel who was again lying in the grass.

"Are you okay?" Buffy pulled him gently to his feet and he groaned softly.

"Yeah I'm fine. Staked him didn't I?" Angel pointed out.

"I don't know, you don't look too good." Buffy worried.

"I think I know why." Spike pointed to a bite mark that glistened with blood on Angel's neck.

"How much did he take?" Buffy demanded.

"Not a lot. A little juice and a cookie and I'll be right as rain."

And that's the last thing Angel remembered before he passed out.

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"What are we gonna do about this, Spike?"

"I don't know...I gotta admit I didn't realise when human he'd become completely incompetent." Spike scoffed.

"He wasn't that bad!" Buffy snapped. "Okay so he was more David than Goliath, but he'll get better right?"

"David won in the end."

"Oh. Well you know what I mean." Buffy brushed off his correction. "Actually that makes it an even better metaphor." Buffy smiled, pleased with herself.

Spike scoffed at her joke and continued. "He had some good fighting techniques, I mean he did get that guy but...I don't know, Slayer."

Angel forced himself to keep his eyes shut, he had to listen to their conversation. Instinctively, he tried to smell to see if anyone else was in the room but he came up with nothing.

"Do you think we should not patrol with him anymore? 'Cause let's be honest he was exactly makin' with the stakin'."

"Can't put the poor bloke out to pasture it's not fair."

"I know and I don't want to. Maybe we can just put him in training with the slayers?" Buffy offered.

"Oh yeah he'll love that. Former master vampire placed on the same level as a bunch of teenagers who've never set foot in battle in their life. That's not embarrassing at all."

"Don't you think I know that?" Buffy hissed. "But I don't want him to die. I have a feeling he might not come back this time!"

"He's not gonna die. We'll just have to train him somehow." Spike pondered that thought for a moment.

"Well you shot down my idea!"

"We'll figure it out, just calm down."

Angel winced at the sound of Buffy's voice, she was swallowing down the tears, he could tell. He cursed himself for making Buffy feel this way and tentatively opened one eye. Angel faked an exaggerated groan and forced himself to sit up.

"How are you feeling?" Buffy was by his side in a second, trailing her dainty hand down his back comfortingly.

"Okay. It's been a while since I was bitten."

"I can imagine." Buffy smiled a little. "I'm gonna head to bed I think, but maybe we'll talk in the morning?"

"Yeah 'course." Angel agreed.

"Night guys." Buffy called as she left Angel's bedroom.

"Sweet dreams, luv." Spike replied.

"I need a favour." Angel said as soon as he heard Buffy's disappearing footsteps.

"Oh? You need me? Isn't this a turn of events." Spike chuckled.

"Not now, Spike. I'm being serious." Angel urged. "Will you help me?"

"Once you tell me what the bloody hell it is I'll think about it." Spike snapped.

"I need you to sire me."


	6. Favours

"Have you absolutely lost your marbles?" Spike yelled.

"What? No! It's a valid request!" Angel replied defensively.

"Siring you, Angel? After how hard you worked for that bleedin' prophecy you're just gonna throw it all away?"

"Keep your voice down! What if Buffy hears us yelling?" Angel hissed.

"I bloody well hope she does! Maybe she can knock some sense into you!"

"C'mon Spike we both know you hate me, always been your dream to drain me dry, right?" Angel advanced towards Spike. "But I forgot you're not man enough to do it. I guess William's still calling the shots..."

"Shut up!" Spike pointed a warning finger at Angel.

"Make me!" Angel dared.

"You poncy, arrogant, good-for-nothing little weasel! Buffy deserves better!"

"You're right!" Angel held out his arms. "So do it! Bite me! Take me out of the running. Get the girl once and for all!"

Angel finally closed the gap between the pair, rage blazing in his eyes. Spike could feel the adrenaline and anger pulsating through Angel's body, his veins quaking with blood. All it would take is one little tilt of his head and he'd get a taste. That's all. And that idiot would just shut up.

Spike took a deep breath, and pressed his face menacingly close to Angel's. "Nice try." He spat.

Spike turned away from him and took a few steps back, giving Angel time to reassess the situation.

Angel sighed heavily. "I know I sound crazy and I know that this is asking a lot. But I can't deal with being human, Spike. I can't be helpless."

"I know, mate." Spike sat beside him. "But you won't have a soul."

"I can get it back, like you did!" Angel offered hopefully.

"If you think Angelus would ever willingly get a soul, you're crazier than I thought."

"I guess. I'm just...scared."

"Of dying?"

"No!" Angel barked before softening again. "No. Of getting someone else killed. Specifically getting Buffy killed."

"Angel that's not gonna happen."

"But it nearly did."

"When? Tonight? She had barely a scratch on her." Spike waved a hand dismissively.

"No, not tonight. When I was human before." Angel quietly revealed.

"What are you talking about?"

"Not long after I first moved to LA, I had a run-in with a demon, while Buffy was in town..."

"Yeah..." Spike prompted.

"And he turned me human again. We had an amazing day together, best day of my life." Angel sighed sadly.

"So what happened?"

"The PTB told me that if I stayed human, I would get Buffy killed. She'd try endlessly to protect me and lose her own life in the process. I couldn't do that to her...so I reversed time."

"You what?" Spike leapt up. "So she-"

"Doesn't even remember it, no. Never happened. The only one who remembers is me." Angel finished.

"Shit." Was all Spike could think of saying. "Well then can I ask you something?" Angel nodded solemnly.

"Why were you so eager to become human again? After what happened last time I mean."

"I don't know...I thought it'd be different this time. Maybe my skills would be better or something. But the big thing was, I didn't think Buffy would be around the next time. She'd be safe."

"And she will be safe." Spike promised.

"How can you know that?"

"Buffy is stronger than she's ever been, she's the longest living slayer and the best goddamn fighter I've ever met. That includes you, Peaches. She's more powerful than she was then, I don't reckon she can even die, I mean we tried to get rid of her twice before." Spike joked. "Bottom line is, she can take care of herself, regardless of whether or not you're human. You're just gonna have to get used to the fact that you're not the hero anymore."

"Hey! I never pretended to be the hero! I've always given Buffy credit where it was due, she's amazing."

"True. But you love the damsel in distress thing, don't pretend." Spike raised an eyebrow at him, daring him to challenge that fact.

"You're right." Angel relented.

"If it makes you feel any better it's not technique, you can still fight it's more the...characteristics you need for it. You know the strength, the speed. Anyway, maybe just ease up on the patrolling, stay behind with the other humans." Spike couldn't risk lumping Angel into the same category as the likes of Andrew and Xander.

"Fine." Angel grunted. Spike nodded in reply and headed for the door.

"Spike?"

"Yeah?" Spike turned back around.

"Thanks." Angel mumbled.

"I didn't quite catch that, Gramps." Spike cupped a hand behind his ear.

Angel glared at him. "I'm not saying it again."

"Eh, fine. Worth a shot."


	7. Humans vs Vampires

The next three months passed by happily. Angel had accepted his new role in the group and thrown himself into research mode, reading and translating all sorts of texts. He'd not been patrolling since that first time and everything was going off without a hitch. Maybe they'd finally found the perfect dynamic.

It was early on a Sunday morning, Buffy was late to her hand-to-hand combat training and was hurrying down the halls. Her Converse slapped against the hardwood floors as she ran and burst through the door of the training room.

"Sorry I'm late guys!" Buffy panted.

"No problem, Slayer. Let's just get going yeah?" Spike shrugged off his duster, preparing for their regular sparring.

"Of course. So I assume Spike already told you today we're working on deflection. We're gonna begin by showing you the basics. We'll try and go slo-mo style and then you guys can give it a shot. Sound good?"

Buffy and Spike easily slipped into a short demonstration of blocking punches. It was very slow and tame, a walk in the park for both fighters, Spike was practically yawning.

"Okay and that's it!" Buffy announced. "Who wants to give Spike a run for his money?"

A few girls gazed around at each other, some elbowing their friend next to them, daring the other to fight him, majority simply cast their eyes downwards hoping not to be chosen.

"Come on guys..." Buffy coaxed.

"I'll take a whack at it." Angel appeared in the doorway.

"Ummm...I don't know if that's the best idea."

"Yeah why don't you go back to your books, Forehead. This room's for the fighters." Spike taunted.

"Spike..." Buffy said warningly.

"Buffy, you're the teacher. Can I give it a shot?"

Before Buffy could reply, Spike did. "Show me what you got, Peaches."

Angel torpedoed over to Spike, knocking the blonde straight off of his feet onto the ground.

"So much for deflection." Buffy noted before turning to the girls. "I guess this is just to show you...how humans fight vampires." Even she would admit that was a little tenuous.

Spike kicked his legs up from the floor, sending Angel catapulting backwards. But before Spike got a chance to gain the upper hand he was back on his feet.

"You got more fight in you than I thought, old man."

"What can I say? I've been practicing."

Angel threw a punch for Spike's head, who easily dodged out of the way and jabbed his fist into Angel's kidney. He doubled over slightly and Spike brought his elbow down onto Angel's back, sending him to his knees.

"Really? Think you need a little more." Spike commented.

"I'm just getting started." Angel wheezed as he clawed for Spike's legs and yanked them from under him. Spike cackled as his backside crashed onto the floor.

Angel leapt onto him to press him down for the count. Spike easily flipped the pair of them, digging his knees into Angel's weak flesh. He thrashed like a shark, struggling desperately to break Spike's vice like grip.

After a few minutes Spike decided. "You're dead, mate." He clambered to his feet and offered Angel a hand up. "I was only holding back a little though."

"Um, well there you go. That was...fun." Buffy stepped back in.

Suddenly, Angel swung his fist back and pounded Spike straight in the nose, spurting blood everywhere. He went in for another with the other hand but Spike caught it. Easily, he crushed Angel's hand within his own, relishing when Angel quietly yelped from the pain. Still keeping ahold of Angel's fist, he socked him twice in the jaw and careered a knee into his groin. Finally, a full on fight broke out. Angel wouldn't give up, despite the fact that Spike was beating him to a bloody pulp.

"Enough!" Buffy screeched.

The two men ignored her, Spike elbowing Angel in the nose and flipping him easily over his shoulder. Angel grabbed Spike into a headlock, tightly twisting them around.

"That's it. It's ass-kicking time."

Both hands at once, Buffy sucker punched the pair in the face. Then she placed her body between them.

"What the bloody hell was that for?" Spike growled wiping blood from his face.

"You two were acting like babies!"

"I was not!" Angel protested.

"Oh yeah waltzing in here challenging Spike to a freakin' duel just to look like a big shot! Well congrats you look like a criminal with your black eye and bloody nose! I hope it was worth it." Spike guffawed at this description of Angel and Buffy turned on him.

"And you! He's human now! You can't go wailing on him like you used to, it's not a fair fight!"

"You're always defending him!" Spike yelled.

"I just defended you too!"

"No you didn't. Nothing's ever good enough is it? It'll always be Angel. He'll always been in the right, he'll always be the one who needs helping or saving. Well that's it. I'm done. You need Angel so much? You can have him. I'm gone."

Spike stormed out of the door, leaving thirty open mouthed stares in his wake.

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"You sure you don't wanna go speak to Spike?" Angel checked.

"I'm sure. He needs time to cool off I'll talk to him then."

"Yeah."

"Why did you do it, Angel?" Buffy asked.

"Do what?"

"Why did you come in here today? Fight Spike? Why have you been training for months without even telling us?"

"There wouldn't have been any point in telling you. It wasn't technique I needed it was speed, strength. Stuff I can get on my own. Do it the old-fashioned way, you know? Get stronger by lifting more, faster by running more. I just needed time."

"You've become a walking bruise, Angel."

"I know. It wasn't the right way to go about it." Angel hung his head in shame. "I just..."

"What?" Buffy asked softly.

"I just wanna be the man you deserve."

Angel reached for Buffy's hand and held it close to his chest, gently caressing it with his thumb. Buffy was surprised at his touch, there was heat radiating from his fingertips, she didn't feel that often.

Angel leant in to Buffy, his eyes fluttered closed and his lips hovered inches from hers. Buffy placed a hand on his chest and lightly pushed him away, releasing her other from his grip.

"Umm...sweet dreams." Buffy stuttered and dashed out of the room.


	8. Buffy & Booze

**_A/N: So sorry I forgot to post last week. Genuinely forgot, first time I've done that! Enjoy ~BB x_**

Buffy speed walked down the corridor, thankful that the sound of the rain battering the castle muffled her hurried footsteps and the pounding of her heart. With a heavy sigh of relief she collapsed onto the couch in the living room, even that large room populated with windows that didn't close properly, where wind whistled through every brick, was a haven as she allowed her eyes to close. Anything to get away from Angel's looming lips, begging for commitment and a relationship. She wasn't ready.

"Buffy?" Dawn yawned.

Buffy opened one eye sceptically. "Dawn? What are you still doing up?"

It was then she noticed her little sister curled up on the couch next to her, a fleecy blanket thrown over her body.

"Me and Spike were watching 10 Things I Hate About You." Dawn gestured to the TV, which was rolling the credits, and Spike slumbering in the armchair opposite them.

"Oh. That's okay, I'll go." Buffy made to leave but Dawn stopped her.

"Don't be stupid. Sit."

"Dawn can I ask you something?"

"Always, you know that."

"But can you promise not to like try and work out what I'm talking about and you know...stick your nose where it doesn't belong?" The last thing Buffy needed was Dawn discovering a newly human Angel had tried to kiss her and she'd turned him down. She'd spill the beans to Spike, making him even angrier and then the whole castle would be abuzz.

"What?" Dawn feigned ignorance then reluctantly agreed. "Fine."

"Good so...wait." Buffy crossed the room to Spike. She waved her hands crazily in front of his face, did a bit of a dance then flicked him on the nose for good measure. No reaction. "Okay good."

Buffy settled back into her seat and asked. "Have you ever wanted something, like really, truly wanted something for a long time, like forever...and then you got it. Just got it so easily and for some reason it just was kinda...so what-ish?"

"Is this about Angel being human?" Dawn questioned eagerly. Buffy gave her a stern look. "Right, sorry. Umm..yeah 'course."

"Like it's not...dumb? A part of me's like Buffy you got what you want just be happy. But at the same time..."

"You're just not." Dawn finished.

"Yeah. Am I mayor of Idiotsville?"

"No, I think it's totally normal. I mean you've built something up in your head for so long. It's like suspense, right? Imagine watching the beginning of a film for years and you've been all on tenterhooks. And then finally you watch the end and it's kinda what you expected all along. It's all...anti-climactic."

"Exactly!" Buffy loudly exclaimed.

"Nope, definitely not a freak." Dawn confirmed. "I tell you what is freakish? Still being up at this time. I'm exhausted so imma head to bed. You coming?"

"Nah I'll clean some of this stuff up." Buffy gestured to the empty popcorn bowl. "Night."

"Night." Dawn mumbled as she clumsily climbed the stairs to her bedroom.

Buffy set about cleaning up the Dawn devastation, hoping it would clear her mind. She was just sliding the DVD back into its case when Spike began to stir. Tentatively, he opened one eye.

"Slayer?"

"Dawn just went to bed. You fell asleep during the film." Buffy explained.

"Oh." Spike pulled himself up and stretched out like a cat.

He trundled across the room into a cupboard at the back and produced a bottle of Jack Daniels and two glasses.

"Fancy a drink?"

"You've been leaving that lying around in a house full of teenagers?!"

Spike shrugged. "They all know it's mine and they all know I'll bite 'em if they drink it. If anything it discourages alcohol."

"I'm too tired to argue over whether that made any sense, just pour me a drink."

"St Buffy is drinking? Well stone me." Spike slid a glass of the caramel liquid across the coffee table to her.

"Rough day."

"Yeah, me and Angel earlier, sorry. That was bloody stupid. Don't know what happened."

"Yeah pretty much. And for the record, I'm sorry if it sounded like I was siding with Angel. I didn't mean it that way." Buffy wanted to add 'after all he did start on you' but figured that wouldn't help the situation so kept her mouth shut.

"I know. I guess I just...overreacted."

Buffy nodded solemnly, thankful he wasn't trying to stir up a fight right now. She so wasn't in the mood.

"He's a better fighter though. That's a good sign."

"True, it is. Maybe one day we'll have another Wood on our hands." Buffy thought for a second. "Though hopefully with slightly less attempts on your life."

"I dunno, that Angel he's a temperamental bloke."

"Tell me about it." Buffy downed the last of her glass and held it out for a top-up.

"Let's pick up where we left off...So I told you what you missed while I was gone. What'd I miss, pet?"

"Hmm...let's see..." In her thinking time, Buffy knocked back her drink and gestured for another. "Well, we needed to search for slayers, and for a while that's what we did. But everyone everywhere was after us, right? 'Cause we created a buttload of slayers, so you know, fair enough." Buffy began hiccuping then and Spike chuckled at her whole body jumping every time she did so.

"Yeah? That it?"

"Hic...no...so we stopped...hic...going everywhere...and settled in Scotland...hic...Giles went to England to begin...hic...the new Watchers Council...hic."

"Slow down, Slayer."

"Yeah I will. Drinks help hiccups right?" Buffy giggled, finishing her next drink and pouring herself her next one. She took a deep breath, curing the hiccups and continued.

"The coven, Giles knows is now in constant contact. They use all that...magicky boom stuff to find us all the itty bitty slayers and we bring them here. Training them in a Buffy Hogwarts. BuffyWarts. HogBuffy? No I got it! Summers School." Buffy nodded dreamily, impressed with herself.

"Good one, pet." Spike chortled.

"I know right?!? So they get a free education in a school in the area if they're kids, they get trained in all kinds of combat and if they're super into it, we send them to Cleveland. It's been working so well..."

"But?" Spike prompted.

"But then your sexy self turned up and reminded me that it suckssssssssssss."

"You think I'm sexy?" Spike teased.

"So not the point..." Buffy wined.

"You're right, continue."

"It's just been kinda boring. Without someone around to throw sarcasm, doubt my methods and clock me one to the face when I'm being an idiot...it's just a little samey..."

"That's it. I'm cutting you off." Spike laughed, prying the glass and bottle from her hands.

"Big Bad gone all softttt? Am I Big Bad Buffy now? Buffy. Buffy. That's a funny name." Buffy cackled crazily to herself and fell straight off of her chair.

"Come on, you're going to bed."

Spike scooped her up bridal-style and began his ascent up the stairs.

"This is your fault. You know Buffy isn't friends with boozey."

Buffy took one last look into Spike's chuckling face and fell asleep.


	9. Exes

It had been a couple of days since The Incident with Angel and Buffy had been avoiding him at all costs. It's what she did best, run away from her problems. And when all else failed, physically ran away from her problems, the castle had a lot of interconnected hallways. It was on a particular moment like that that Angel finally felt it had to stop.

"Buffy?"

"Yeah." Buffy spun on her heel.

"I have to ask you something."

"Shoot." Buffy gestured for him to continue, faking an air of bubbliness.

"Let's just go into my room for a sec."

They walked in silence for a few minutes until his room, when he let them in and Buffy heaved a sigh.

"What's up?"

"Is this ever gonna happen for us?" Angel blurted out bluntly.

"Us? Is there even an us anymore, Angel?" Buffy admitted, if he was being blunt, so was she. Maybe sometimes they should do a little more of that.

"I'm human, Buffy. It's all you've ever wanted, a normal life." Angel said persuasively.

He was right. That is all she'd ever wanted. A nice, normal human boyfriend who she loved and who loved her. Someone she could grow old with and have kids with. A person who was happy with the slayer and the girl. And here he was, giving her all of that. And yet...

"It's not enough." Buffy whispered.

"But we can be normal, Buffy." Angel said, almost pleadingly.

"We'll never be normal, Angel. I'll never be normal. And you know what I've realised in this time when I'm a little more normal, in the sense that I'm one of hundreds of slayers?" Buffy channeled her thoughts into pacing across the room. "I realised that normal...kinda sucks. I don't wanna be normal. Maybe I never have. But it doesn't matter 'cause I never will be. So, no Angel. It's not enough, you being human. I'm sorry."

"What?" Angel breathed.

"I know it's confusing, I'm kinda confused too." Buffy laughed emotionlessly. "I mean...it's all I've ever wanted. You Angel, and human." Tears rolled down her cheeks as she choked out the words. "And yet, it's not enough. I don't want this."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying. I don't think there's an us anymore, Angel."

"What does this mean?" Angel rubbed the back of his neck worriedly.

"I don't know."

"Well when did it happen?"

"I don't know." Buffy said frustratedly. "I loved you for so long. And over that time, so much has changed, I've changed. I guess so did my feelings. I'd built you up in my head to be this hero, my knight but I convinced myself it could never work while you were a vampire. That the solution to all my problems would be you human."

Buffy stopped pacing and collected her thoughts while Angel looked on in silence. "I mean for God's sake, I met you when I was fifteen, Angel! The Buffy you want and the Angel I thought I needed...They're not us anymore. There is no us anymore." Tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks, gushing like an open faucet.

"But I'm human." Angel echoed helplessly. "What am I supposed to do now?"

Buffy rushed to his side and pulled him into her body. His hulking form awkwardly rested on her small shoulders, as she attempted to force her tears away.

"You'll work it out." Buffy pulled away from him. "You always do."

"But I'm human and the only two people I've ever loved in the world, I can't even have." Angel thought about Cordelia and her visit to him after she died, yes it was the closest they'd ever been in a while, the last few months of her life weren't even her; but he'd loved her. Just like he'd loved Buffy.

"Love _d_ , Angel."

"What?"

"You just said love _d_."

"Cordelia is dead." Angel harshly said.

"I know. But I'm not. You don't love me anymore either, Angel."

"That's not what I meant!"

"Well, your subconscious knows what you don't. I think you've convinced yourself of me as much as I have of you. Real life Buffy and Angel just aren't as spectacular as our minds make them out to be, huh?"

Angel sighed in resignation. "I guess you're right."

"You're welcome to stay here, you know. Fight the good fight. We have plenty of humans on board." Buffy got practical now, wiping away the last of her tears and crossing her arms.

"I don't know. It's all a little...fresh."

"You can finally have a normal life, Angel!" Buffy crossed towards him and placed her hands firmly around his shoulders. "Live it."

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"Cordy? I don't know if you can hear me. Or if you can even see me and I haven't gone completely crazy..." Angel trailed off, no longer sure he wanted to continue. Then the lamp on his bedside table flicked on. "Cordelia?" The lamp flicked off and on again.

Angel laughed heartily at seeing this. "Oh Cordy!"

The headboard rattled loudly against the wall.

"Is that your way of telling me to just get on with what I wanted to say?"

The lamp flicked off and on again.

"Okay, I get the message." Angel chuckled. "We finally did it. Me and Buffy. We ended us. And it was...painful. But I'm glad it finally happened. Closure."

Angel's eyes travelled to his hands, where he was wringing them in his lap. "I just wish I coulda done it while you were still alive, you know? Wish we'd seen what we have sooner, and I coulda proved to you that me and Buffy, we're not each other's 'the one' anymore. And I'm actually okay with that."

Angel sighed in despair, the guilt of late promises and undecided futures clouded his mind. Gently, he felt a hand stroke up and down his back. Angel jumped at the contact, desperately looking around for Cordelia. But nothing was there. "Thanks."

Angel said lamely. "You're really not coming back are you?"

Lamp on.

"But you're happy there, right? You don't wanna come back..."

Lamp off, lamp on, lamp off.

"So you like it there, but you're not sure if you wanna be back here or not?"

Lamp on.

"Right. Well I'm human now. So whenever I die, we can be together. I think. No hell dimensions for me, no sir."

The lamp flicked on and off over and over excitedly, Angel chortled.

"I love you, Cordy."

No reaction. Then slowly the pen on his desk hovered in the air, and clearly with all the strength she could muster (a higher power channeling energy to move objects on the human plane was extremely difficult) it began to write. Slowly, it scrawled across the page and then fell heavily back to the desk in exhaustion. Angel dashed over to the desk, snatching the paper up in his hand. Then a tear slipped from his eye, smacking the paper. He folded it up, lovingly and placed a kiss on it, sliding it into his pocket.

The note read. 'The feeling's mutual...duh.'


	10. FINAL

Spike sent the girls straight upstairs to get washed up, they'd tackled a pretty nasty demon and gotten showered in its gooey green blood. He was impressed though, only a few of them had shrieked and they'd all been in the splash zone. Much better than Xander's first demon blooding, or so he'd heard. He groaned as he lifted all of the heavy battle axes back into the case and traipsed through into the kitchen to sponge some blood off of his duster.

"Spike?" Angel called into the kitchen.

Spike spun around. "Alright?"

"Yeah I just wanted to tell you that I'm leaving."

"What you and Buffy chasing some demon or something?" Spike asked absent-mindedly as he hung his coat on the back of a chair.

"Or something..." Angel replied.

"Well when you coming back?" Spike wondered. "Wanna know how long I gotta hold the fort down for."

"It's just me. Buffy's staying."

"Alright, but it's your funeral." Spike shrugged.

"I'm going to Faith. Gonna go be with her and everyone on the Cleveland Hellmouth. There's nothing left for me here now."

Spike suddenly exploded and Angel almost jumped at the outburst. "Are you kidding me? You poncy bugger! Gonna run off into the night, coat tails a-blazin' and leave Buffy alone, again. For all your talk of 'forever love' you sure do run away from it a lot!" Spike smacked the counter top in anger.

"That's not what I'm doing." Angel growled. "For once, we're actually making the right decision."

"Yeah right." Spike scoffed, pushing past him out of the kitchen.

Angel hurried after him, catching him on the stairs. "Spike! Think whatever you want but, I'm really going. So I just wanted to say...thanks for saving my life." Angel mumbled embarrassedly.

"Don't get all soppy on me, Peaches." Spike grimaced. "And for the record, thanks for having me in LA."

"It wasn't so much out of hospitality as it was out of I couldn't kill you." Angel shrugged honestly.

"In our line of work? Potato, potahto."

"Take good care of her." Angel said warningly.

"Always do."

0000000000000000000000000000000

"Hey, Buff." Xander noticed Buffy sitting atop the stairs as him and Willow rounded the corner.

"Hi guys."

Willow and Xander slumped down next to her on the stairs.

"Feel like it hasn't been just the three of us in forever." Willow realised.

"Yeah try seven years." Xander quipped.

"Yeah, sorry I've been so busy with Angel and Spike. I just wanted to get things up and running, you know?"

"Don't sweat it. You did what you had to do." Willow assured Buffy.

"Yep, I really did." Buffy thought back to her moment of clarity with Angel.

"Earth to Buffster." Xander waved a hand in front of Buffy's face.

"Sorry. Just thinking."

"He already left, huh?" Willow guessed.

"Yup." Buffy nodded.

"You okay?" Xander asked, nudging her a little.

"You know what? I think I actually am. And that's made me feel all guilt girl."

"Worst superhero ever." Xander joked.

"So you and Angel? You're really over?" Willow asked gently.

"Uh huh. Done. Fin. Finito. Gonzo. Finished. Finally over."

"What about Spike?" Willow wondered.

"Spike? The second vampire I fell in love with who came back from the dead, didn't even tell me and has been fighting by my side for months and a grand total of zilch has happened between us? That Spike?"

"So that's a no-go?"

"Honestly, Will, I have no clue."

"As much as I hate to say this, and emphasis on the hate here, you and Spike...you've been through a lot together. And yes Fang Boy Jr has screwed up more times than I can count...but he's proved you can trust him, that we can all trust him. He became a fully-fledged Scooby after you died and looked after Dawn every day. He fought by your side even without a soul. And speaking of which, he got a soul for you. When faced with the First he didn't back down and he died like a hero, saving the world. If a track record like that doesn't get you in the good books of Buffy, then there's no hope for the rest of us. Give the guy a chance." Xander announced.

"When did you get so wise?" Buffy smiled.

"I've always been this way, I just play dumb."

"I don't think you've been playing dumb for twenty plus years, Harris." Willow raised an eyebrow.

"Why have you guys gotta be right all the time?" Buffy grinned at her two favourite people in the world.

"It's a blessing and a curse." Willow nodded seriously.

"All this lovey dovey talk all the time. Just tells me one thing, my girls have got game." Xander snaked an arm around both of the women pulling them into his chest.

0000000000000000000000000000000

"Mornin' luv."

"It's the middle of the afternoon." Buffy pointed out, Spike shrugged. "I guess you heard that Angel left."

"Yup. Bummer." Spike deadpanned.

Buffy crossed the room towards him and reached for his hands. He pulled away from her before they could touch and took a few steps back.

"What's wrong?" Buffy asked, hurt.

"I'm done being this, Buffy."

Buffy gasped at the sound of her real name on Spike's lips. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm done being the consolation prize. Done being the person you run to every time Angel isn't available. And now he's left you again and you've gone back to me. The lackey who's never brave enough to say no."

"Spike that's not-"

"No. I said no, Buffy. I'm done. I can't be that again."

Spike angrily stomped away from Buffy and out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

"Spike! Wait!" Buffy sprinted down the corridor after him, ignoring the confused looks from a few slayers as she rocketed past them. "Spike!!!!!"

"What?" He barked angrily, halting in the middle of the corridor.

"Can we talk about this?" Buffy pleaded.

"So go on then, Slayer. Talk." Spike dared.

Buffy gazed nervously around the corridor, there was a group of red-faced slayers in one corner, desperately looking anywhere but at them and Dawn was chatting with Kennedy at the other end. But it was now or never.

"Angel left because I didn't want him, Spike."

"What?"

"Me and Angel are done."

"Hate to point it out but you and Angel have been 'done' since '99." Spike snarked.

"I mean really this time." Buffy hastily added. "We talked, properly talked. Something we've been avoiding for way too long. And we did it. Ended our chapter, said goodbye, for real."

"So you're not in love with him?"

"No, and I don't think I have been for a while." Buffy took a few steps closer to him, drowning out the giggles from the slayers around them.

"Yeah? Anyone else in mind then?" Spike smirked.

"Spike, you became good for me. You got your soul for me. You risked your life time and time again for me. You've protected my family and my friends. And more importantly you've proved that you didn't do all of those things just for me. You did them for you and the man you've become. You're everything I've ever wanted or needed. Have we always got along? Fuck no." Spike grinned at that comment. "But have we always made up? Pretty much. I love you. All of you, from William to Spike, and everything in between."

"No you don't. But thanks for saying it." Spike couldn't resist. "Too soon?"

"Way too soon." Buffy glared but she still felt a smile tug at her lips.

Finally she closed the steps between them and interlocked her fingers with his. Spike stared down into her eyes, the pools of blue fixated on her determined gaze.

"I love you too."

"Just shut up and kiss me."

Spike leant down and his lips met hers. It was soft and nervous at first, their lips slowing down, savouring the moment. Their bodies screamed out for more as Buffy's hands travelled to the back of his neck pulling him further into her and his hands tightened around her waist. They sparked with anticipation as their faces pulled apart and Buffy panted breathlessly. Then they became aware of the wolf whistles and applause engulfing them.

Buffy blushed furiously, her grip on Spike's hand tightening in embarrassment. "Oh my God."

"Not God, just Spike."

Buffy cackled as Spike yanked her along with him, pulling her into his bedroom.

 ** _And that's all she wrote! This fic has been an amazing experience for me, I've enjoyed every second of it and am very sad to see it go. I want to thank everybody who was kind enough to follow or favourite it, I've never received such positive feedback from a fic before so thank you so much. The sequel to this fic is up RIGHT NOW and is called Too Good to Be True, in case you're interested!_**

 ** _A huge thank you to all my reviewers: HIddenSoul1978, JayeMaru, rebekahpsweatman81, Moony.R.J.Lupin, nrdhrd3, Sunkissu9 and, as always, Mother Wilson for her continued support and honesty._**

 ** _~BB x_**


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